Architect

I saw you with those two “ladies of the evening” at Elzars. Explain that. Anyhoo, your net-suits will allow you to experience Fry’s worm infested bowels as if you were actually wriggling through them. Goodbye, friends. I never thought I’d die like this. But I always really hoped.

I guess if you want children beaten, you have to do it yourself. Oh, I always feared he might run off like this. Why, why, why didn’t I break his legs? Well, thanks to the Internet, I’m now bored with sex. Is there a place on the web that panders to my lust for violence?

You wouldn’t. Ask anyway! But existing is basically all I do! Ah, yes! John Quincy Adding Machine. He struck a chord with the voters when he pledged not to go on a killing spree. She also liked to shut up!

Kids have names? You’ve killed me! Oh, you’ve killed me! They’re like sex, except I’m having them! Kif, I have mated with a woman. Inform the men. Fry, we have a crate to deliver. That’s a popular name today. Little “e”, big “B”? Why am I sticky and naked? Did I miss something fun? You can see how I lived before I met you. I’ve got to find a way to escape the horrible ravages of youth. Suddenly, I’m going […]

Check it out, y’all. Everyone who was invited is here. I love this planet! I’ve got wealth, fame, and access to the depths of sleaze that those things bring. Our love isn’t any different from yours, except it’s hotter, because I’m involved. Okay, I like a challenge. Whoa a real live robot; or is that some kind of cheesy New Year’s costume? It’s toe-tappingly tragic! Daylight and everything. It’s okay, Bender. I like cooking too. I’ve been there. My folks […]

Soon enough. Enough about your promiscuous mother, Hermes! We have bigger problems. Oh, I think we should just stay friends. There’s one way and only one way to determine if an animal is intelligent. Dissect its brain! Who are you, my warranty?! I videotape every customer that comes in here, so that I may blackmail them later. Oh God, what have I done? Leela’s gonna kill me. Actually, that’s still true. When I was first asked to make a film […]

Why, those are the Grunka-Lunkas! They work here in the Slurm factory. Oh, I think we should just stay friends. Bender, being God isn’t easy. If you do too much, people get dependent on you, and if you do nothing, they lose hope. You have to use a light touch. Like a safecracker, or a pickpocket.

We don’t have a brig. Fry! Quit doing the right thing, you jerk! You guys aren’t Santa! You’re not even robots. How dare you lie in front of Jesus? And I’m his friend Jesus. Fetal stemcells, aren’t those controversial? I don’t want to be rescued. If rubbin’ frozen dirt in your crotch is wrong, hey I don’t wanna be right. You don’t know how to do any of those. I just told you! You’ve killed me! Can we have Bender […]